Friday, October 31, 2008

BOOOOOO Is Like 8,000,000 Only Scarier!

"Look, the lights on, let's go get some candy!"

"Looks creepy, maybe we shouldn't."

"They're just dead flowers! Let's get some candy!"


A hand comes out of one of the flower pots and grabs the small one's legs! Something thumps on to the ground behind the big one who is screaming at even higher decibels than the small one. Two ghoulish arms reach around and...the screen goes black...the scream continues a moment longer and then that, too, ends...

We probably wouldn't get many trick or treaters next year if that happened...or maybe we would, what with us being so far from Nebraska...

Happy Halloween! I hope you all scare the bejeebers out of all those wayward spirits and they go back where they came from!

Looks like everyone posted on Halloween. I will attemp a more creative one this evening.... If not, though, I hope everyone has a safe and fun holiday!

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Costume Malfunction

By malfunction, I mean, it isn't there. I want to wear something for Halloween tomorrow, but I just don't think it is going to happen. I asked Cora to build me a Borg costume months ago, and, unless she plans on unveiling it early tomorrow morning(which I doubt), I have nothing to wear. I mean, yeah, I could go as a substitute teacher, but it's been done! I have some hats...and even a few helmets...I am not sure how they will work. So, I guess I just won't worry about it.

I have always liked hats. I guess it has something to do with that Bugs Bunny cartoon where a truck load of hats flips over and releases tons of hats into the wind. Each hat in turn lands on Bugs and Elmer Fudd, ad they each take on the attributes associated with the hats. At one point a bonnet lands on one of them and a top hat on the other, and one becomes the suitor of the other. Then a drill sergeant's hat lands on one and a General's hat on the could happen! well, I can't afford not to be ready to instantly be able to fly a helicopter just by donning a helicopter helmet. How upset would I be if the opportunity came up and I did not own a helicopter pilot's helmet?

And you never know when a wormhole will open up and transport you back to WWI! You have to be ready!

or East Germany during the Cold War???

How about the Air Force? All I need is a silver bird!

or the 1930s? Play it again Sam! Where is the nearest speak easy?

And, my best guess is I should be ready to golf with this one...

and finllay, given my propensity for exploring Naval facilities I am not supposed to...the last one might come in pretty handy.

What do you folks think? Should I wear a hat for Halloween? I am teaching High School tomorrow. I enjoy popularity, if not extreme respect. Go figure.
I appreciate your suggestions!

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Cars, Trucks, and Spilled Doritos

We watched some movies the other day. One of them was Christine, the Stephen King classic. I am certain most people are familiar with the movie, which stars an evil 1958 Plymouth Fury. I love that movie...something about the music, the evil car, and the nerd cum cool guy...well, it's a good flick. I have to admit that movie has added to the strange and constant soundtrack in my head. "B-B-B-Bad, B-B-B-B-Bad." Oh, yeah, I rock to music nobody else hears! "Every woman I meet, they all stay satisfied..." "I hear ya knockin', butcha can't come in!"

I guess I would not mind a creepy car like that, but I do like my beautiful Tacoma. I named my Tacoma Apollo. Apollo Ono had, shortly after we got the truck, shown how well he handled on ice. In the early days of March, 2002, Cora and I decided to spend my spring break on the beach. As luck would have it, a late winter storm blew up on the coast that week. It snowed until we were within 20 miles of the beach. During that time we witnessed the total ineptness of Western Washington drivers in the snow. My truck? It handled well (probably doesn't hurt that we in Eastern Washington drive in snow pretty reliably). I decided at that point it had to have a name that was descriptive of this handling, thus Apollo.

I taught kindergarten again today. They were better today, or maybe I knew what I expected from them and made them give it to me...everytime I saw pieces of paper and crayons on the floor, I called them to drop everything and start picking up! There is no reason for these kids to do at school what they would unlikely be allowed to do at home. More specifically, it was the child at lunch who looked me in the eye and popped his Dorito bag, which exploded downward onto the floor. I had him put his lunch down and pick up his mess. He did not seem to expect me to do that...fooled him!

Cora came home and we headed out to get some things. Then, much to my extreme pleasure, I convinced her we should just eat out! Ha! Victory!! We ate Chinese food at Ki Ki's! Now we are relaxing in our easy chairs. Ah, this is the life!

Witch Way Are You Going?

I saw a witch yesterday. She was walking with a villager type person who was either her friend or her prey. Seems the local elementary holds a Hoedown this time of year, with pumpkins and fun activites tht the kids look forward to for weeks ahead of time. I suspect the witch and her compnion were headed in that direction.

I got home to a wonderful dinner of Corned Beef and speghetti squash! And some pumpkin shaped/flavored cookies! How awesome is that? Cora is such a good cook! I could get used to, if only I could get orund to getting a full time job...

I taught Kinders yesterday. What a wild bunch. I teach the sme kids today. The second day is almost always better, since then the sub has a feel for that classroom's normal activities.

This morning I have been suffering from some sort of sore muscle/bone in my shoulder that seems to make breathing deeply not very much fun. Cora thinks a chiropractor might help...I think a 2X4 smacked into the right part of my back might help. Yee-ouch! I hope it figures itself out soon, it is MOST unpleasurable.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

I Can Feel It Coming In The Air Tonight

Oh, I remember. I remember a time when the chill wind blew across the back of your neck and you could feel things were not right.
I remember when the dark was something to be avoided. I remember cold evenings and running to make it home before whatever waited in the shadows came out. I dreaded the cold claws, dark capes, sharp talons, cool blood, slashing teeth, and warm saliva. I knew it was only a matter of time before it came out and got me.

Halloween is near...and I feel the hair on the back of my neck rising. It is near...

It is time to dress up for Halloween!

Monday, October 27, 2008

You Call, I Fold

It was a nice day. Sunny and not too cold. I taught. Well, I had kids with me for measured amounts of time and I hope they picked something up. I still felt a little off because of my beloved cold. I made several hundred copies. I also left early because I wasn't feeling wonderful and I had no more kids to work with.

I came home and started a load of dishes and some laundry. I then spent the next hour or so folding clothes. It is better for me to do it when Cora isn't here, since I am incapable of doing it the "right" way. What do you mean they're supposed to be squard? Whts wrong with the way I pile underwear haphazardly I'm suppoed to fold them? fold underclothes? When she got home, I stopped. The coffee table is now about 16 inches deep in folded clothes...maybe I can get Cora to put them away, since that is clearly the part I hate most about laundry.

I have been in contact with a gentleman concerning Exercise Coulee Crest...that exercise in 1962 that I blogged about back in May. He was part of it and I have lots of good information for a coming post on my other blog from him. Kinda makes me happy.

Tomorrow, I teach Kinders...for two days. I enjoy kindergartners...things are so much simpler. On the down side, they miss out on a bunch of my jokes. I think 6th graders get the most of my jokes...they are just old enough for the upper level jokes and still appreciate my childish humor.

Mopey Monday

I am not terribly mopey, but apparently I can only get sick and feel horrible on days of the weekend. I feel pretty darn good today! I think it is because it is Monday and since we had to get up, I felt like staying in bed. Isn't that how it works? If I have nowhere to be and no plans, I wake up extra early. If I have to be somewhere at a particular time, like work, I could stay in bed for hours. Well, that seems to be the standard mode of operations.
Oh, and what is it about Sully that makes him sleep like this?

Today promises to be fairly standard. No frost on the windows, nice. One hour late start. I am subbing for the reading teacher, and she has things I cannot sub for, so I have frequent breaks. Last week she had me busy making copies during those breaks. I look forward to more of the same. What really happens is I start some copie and get bored and find someone to go talk to...then I get back to copying again. It doesn't sound like it, but it makes for a long day.

If you like science fiction like I do, and if you like art, why not drop by this blog and take a look at the neat pictures and media this person has takes awhile to load...or maybe, more likely, it is my dinosaur of a laptop, but it is worth the wait. I spent the better part of yesterday surfing through it off and on. I like the ones that are so well put together artistically that it could just as well hang on your wall as be on the net.
I had some requests for picture of Cora and I on our drive...I was saving those for Cora to post...she doesn't appreciate it when I use ALL the good pics. I don't blame her. Here is one of the pair of us. And also a COOL car we saw. A Challenger, which I wanted to cll a Charger, but the chrome did not lie. It is NEW right off the lot. The guy was very nice and let me take some pics.

Well, I am going to need more coffee and a can of Lysol for work...

Sunday, October 26, 2008

Misery Loves Company

Those sweet little munchkins with the heavenly little smiles, the squeaky little voices, great big hearts, and the tiny little hands...MADE ME SICK. I started getting the sore throat on Thursday. I began combatting it immediately...which may have only put off the agony until today. Last night, while I was tired, I could not get to sleep until roughly 2:38am. I woke bright and early at 5:43am because I could no longer breathe through my nose. I tried to remedy it with cold meds, but it was no use. I got a little sleep this afternoon. I feel like I was splitting firewood all day. In fact, I sat on my ass. For some reason, though, that does not keep every single muscle in my body from aching. Oh, I am going to kill the little bastard bicycle pump elf that has been raising the pressure in my head when I wasn't looking.

I think I may have accidentally left some of my cold/flu laying around and Cora might have accidentally stepped in it...Hmmm, that visualization is not quite right...that makes it sound like I barfed. I did not. I am just saying that Cora took some of my left over cold and seems to be miserable, too! We have been two pathetic humans today. At least I have had company.

We had a nice roast for dinner. Not quite gourmet, but certainly yummy! Which reminds me. We stopped for lunch yesterday at this German place in a basement. We had some German fare that I don't think I had ever had before. Brats, sour kraut, German potato salad, and some other nice goodies. Oh, yeah, and the beer.

I work at the elementary tomorrow...that is one hour late start on Monday...which means I don't have to be there until 9:15!! Now, let's all hope I get some sleep to match. I should probably spray the little angels with Lysol when they come in...

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Bavarian Blast!

We got up and relaxed. Then we got dressed and headed out on the highway and drove to Leavenworth, Washington. It is about 2 hours away, probably considerably less if some of the idiots we have in this state would stay off the road...that is my roadrage face...I think Cora was attempting to interject some levity. I don't usually have that much of a potty mouth...unless I am behind the wheel. Why in the hell would you drive 35mph on a highway? Next time I go over that stretch of highway, I want to bring anti-idiot missiles!

We got there, and it was beautiful. The weather was in full cooperation and made for a great day! If you are not familiar with it, Leavenworth, Washington has a Bavarian/Alpish theme. It is a tourist town, but great to visit.

Since it is a German theme, we had to have a beer in the beer garden...See how Cora hides her beer? (behind a gorgeous smile)

Mostly we just walked around the shops and bought things.

My favorite was the Hat Shop. What do you think? British Bobby?

Or drunken pirate?

Cora even got into the fun...I think she is a Mongolian Empress.

Or there is this look...I thought it particularly cute!

And after a beer or two, Cora will put anything on...OK, I put her up to it...Hats were fine,
But put her in a candy shop and look at her eyes!

It is a pretty little town. It had a pretty little girl...

Look how she glows!

But even glowing princesses need a she is waiting for me to get her coffee from...

During the day we ran into the director of our Adoption Agency. They suggested we try some huge apples sold at a nearby fruit is Cora walking back to the car.
Holy Crap! That's Close!

We stopped on our way back and tried to get some pictures of the Fall foliage in the fading light.

We made it home with nary a scratch! Tired. We got some momentos, but mostly just enjoyed each other's company and a fun day away from the house that refuses to clean itself while we are gone. Stupid house.
It was a beautiful day and a beautiful way to celebrate 18 months of being logged in in China.
Oh, and Happy Birthday Carrie!!!!!

Friday, October 24, 2008

Friday Festivities

So, once again, I was faced with the most difficult day ever. I subbed for a math teacher at the HS. It is Homecoming this weekend...the kids were colored, which is not being racist, but, rather, observant of their hues. They were school colors...almost every one of them. They were not especially concentrating on learning today, either. Man, they were a rowdy bunch.

The teacher knew this and left simple such and such, questions 1-5...easy. OK, that was nice, but by far not the best part. They had a 15 minute pep assembly first thing off...I did not need to attend. Then, given the day, I did not see any need to force them to do stuff they did not want to do. Finally, as a nod to the day, there was another assembly during what would normally have been 6th period...sixth period was mostly moved into the 5th period time slot and the teaching day shortened accordingly. My teacher has 6th period plan...that means I left at 12:45pm. I got there at 7:30pm. I had a lunch. I got paid for the full day!!!!!

I then went into town and got some groceries. Victuals for tonight. Ahh..., the lovely aroma of tacos. Well, what did you expect? Filet Mignon?

Tomorrow we are considering going for a drive before OPEC can try to drive gas prices up again. Here is what I think of you OPEC: Bastards (read it thusly: Bee-yass-tards!)! Where are we going you may ask? Not so sure yet. Maybe the mountains with the dogs...maybe Leavenworth(NO, not the prison.)...of course, my vote is for an airplane museum...I think that may be why Cora did not give me a vote. Shoot, I might have time to convince Toby to change his vote.

Fall is totally here. I had to dump water on my windshield to get the fricking ice off. Why not scrape? Well, people, while I may get up an hour before I have to get there, I spend an inordinate amount of time checking blogs for new I get out there with the amount of time I would expect to need if the windshield was, in my rush to get moving I rinse off the windshield with the water I did not finish the day before...then it freezes and I curse the weather nd the cold. I then let the windshield wiper fluid create a blue ice sculpture, until the wipers can find enough purchase to break it off, then I have a small hole through which to see. I begin moving. Fortunately, there is little traffic at that time. By the time I get to work...well, the hole is bigger and no lives have been unnecessarily endangered (When I need to get to work...I NEED TO GET TO WORK, ITS NECESSARY!!).

Tomorrow, we will have been waiting for a child from China for 18 months. That's a year-and-a-half. Add to that that we have been trying for kids for 8 years...and we haven't even gotten ONE! Well, it stinks. I am happy that we are closer, but sad that it seems so far away.

Thursday, October 23, 2008


Oh, the pain...

Thank you Littlemisswhatshername. My beloved wife tagged me...and how fortunate it is, since, just yesterday, I gave random thoughts a shot and came up with bullets (Nice pun, don't you think?).

  • I like to eat. I also like to cook. (you can see me doing the former here)

  • This might be a sub-entry to the above, but I love In-N-Out Burgers.

  • I have a secret (Ooops) crush on Abby from NCIS...I suspect I am not the only one.

  • I dig clever things done well. I don't know where I got this photo, but whoever took it deserves to sell his photography for large sums!

  • I have a strange interest in all things space. The moon especially...

  • I get a kick out of being places I am not supposed to. Case in point: I went to Mare Island Naval Yard to explore after it was closed. The sign on the gate said to go straight to your point of business and nowhere else...I figured I was there to see the base and proceeded as though I owned the place. No one bothered me. Then I saw this ship. Note the opened door at the top of the ramp. As I walked up to find someone to see what they were doing on deck I was confronted by signs that said things like "US NAVY INSTALLATION, KEEP OUT." and other nice things. No one was at the little lecturn or in the office. There was a group of guys across the hangar deck from me. I walkd up and they were very friendly for about 15 seconds...until they saw the camera hanging from my neck...then I was politely escorted off ship. I still spent some more time on base...I am not easily deterred.

  • I don't usually find fishing as exciting as, say, sewing, but I like it when my Father-In-Law is in the boat...somehow, it's just more fun. Even if we don't catch a thing.

  • I am a science fiction fan. Star Trek is awesome...and I don't know why! ...You left me... on Genesis...why did you do this? Climb the steps Jim...Climb the steps of Mount Selaya... Spock, Mount Selaya is on Vulcan...

  • I don't really like airplanes...but I dig pilots! Lisa, you gotta share! LOL!!

And Dori's Mom...I can keep going, but I've run out of photographic illustrations!

  • The only reason people think I am a good teacher is I m funny...don't tell, ok?
  • The only reason people think I am a good people, I am funny...takes all kinds.
  • I think the word Genetalia is funny. I think the subject is fun.
  • I like things that go boom.
  • I like plants.
  • I like my dog...he has a cute butt, see here to confirm. (scroll to the bottom to see)
  • Sea Urchin stings only hurt a little bit.

Now I am supposed to tag someone else...I can only think of two who have commented on my blog and who I don't think have been tagged yet...Sorry!

Lisa at A Motherlode!


Jen at Blissfully Caffeinted!

The rules are at the top. I hope you all enjoyed my pain!

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Suborbital Cranial Ruminations

I sometimes have random thoughts. Rarely, actually. Some might argue that I do not really have thoughts. I argue that I do, and since no one is hacking into my brain to say otherwise, I win. Hmmm, I read the Bean today, and she's got me thinking about little men in my brain functioning as autopilots (hence the brain hacking)...don't ask me, just go read it.

So, given the randomness of my mind this evening, let me ask you a few questions. Have you ever considered the number of people responsible for designing such a thing as a ball point pen? Did you ever consider that there is a limited number of vegatables in the grocery store, and yet, we seem to have an unlimited number of dinners available...or do we? How many sources of meat do they sell in the grocery store? Beef, chicken, pork, turkey, fish, maybe lamb? Oh, and I don't include soy or boca burgers as meat...let alone food.

So, here is a question: If you could be a sea creature what would you be? I think I would be a crab...I dig pinching others! Oh, and having your own armour? Way too cool.

I noticed alot of other bloggers using bullets lately...maybe I should try it. I will start with a few random facts.

  • I don't get computers like others my age do, let alone my wife's Grandmother.
  • I like airplanes, but am not a pilot.
  • Cora is more responsible than I am.
  • I think the latest Mucinex commercial has the mucus characters scaled up WAY too much.
  • I like e-bay, but Cora doesn't like what I want to buy.
  • Pilot's helmets should come into fad as a cool thing to wear...everywhere.
  • If they let teachers drink in school, there would be fewer drunk teachers at home.
  • Parents get more annoying as they get older.
  • They should allow certain people (me) to travel as fast as my car will go.
  • Money isn't everything, but a bunch of things would be so much easier if I had more of it.

There, that's, seriously, what kind of sea creature would you be?

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Ansel Adams Eat Your Heart Out!

Yeah, I am the cool sub. I spent my first part of the day at the middle school and taught all of two classes...actually, I gave them assignment and then read a book. I sent one little bastard to talk to the appropriate person in the office as he was a.) disrupting class b.) disrespecting me ad the class and c.) cutting into my reading time. Also, he would just not shut up. These are the JROTC classes...they play army...well, the way it goes is the chosen child calls "A-ten-shun!" and the whole class stands up. He takes role, and I have very little to do for the rest of the period.

Beyond that, it was an uneventful day. I drove over to the High School after taking a short break and checking my e-mail at home, and checking our snail mail at the post office. I got there, signed in, and went to my room. I checked the schedule and still had an hour before my first class! I read, made a couple calls, and then had lunch with the teachers. I came back to the room, then read a little more. Finally the bell rang and I began work...for less than two hours. WOW. I had a very hard day!

I dropped a few things off at the in-laws and picked up our camera (Cora had left it there yesterday) this morning. After work, all four hours (for which I was paid for an entire day), I dropped by the shop to say hi to the guys in maintenance, then I took a short drive and took some pictures.

Yes, these are untouched by human hands(and editing programs). It's all in the digital lab baby! although, I was a bit of a natural in the photo lab, too...NO, REALLY! Ask Cora. I love the smell of developer and fixer!

Yes, Ansel Adams would have been asking me for pointers, but I would have just told him to go find a National Park or something. "Jeez, Ansel, again? Why don't you just go find some natural rock formations and see what you can do under different environmental conditions?" And there was Ansel's career making photos for calendars...I just gave it to him.

Play the Sub Game!

So, I have a special day here. I sub for a guy who goes between two schools. He starts in the morning at the Middle School, then goes over to the HS halfway through. Here is the awesome part. I get paid for a full day. Let me explain. I showed up at 715am this morning (The time at which teachers are supposed to show up at the MS) and was told that his first class is not until 930am. OK. Cool, I just came back home (5 blocks) and had some more coffee.

I subbed at the HS yesterday. As usual, the kids are smartasses...but, so am I. I think that lends to my popularity. Weird. Still, I am a sub that has never sunk...I have been damaged with a heavy list, but never sunk.

I found it amusing how no one but my beloved wife cottoned onto the idea of a picture being worth 1000 words. I think her Goonies quote was an added bit of flair...though, I am not sure I compare to Chunk THAT well.

Which reminds me, I offered the classes the chance to get out a minute early if they could identify the movie from which I quoted. Here is the quote: "I don't like you either...I've got the death sentence in twelve systems!" I may have paraphrased a little, but the gist is there. I wonder if any of you can identify the movie. I might be inclined to reward a correct answer! (NOT CORA, since she already knows!)

Well, the clock is inching toward the time when I need to leave...OH, the torture of beig a substitute teacher!!!

Sunday, October 19, 2008


So, I noticed that Halloween is just around the corner. I also noted that I haven't been very creative lately. I decided to rectify that between cleaning house (by cleaning, I mean sitting on my ass watching TV) and surfing the net and sitting on my ass. I drew these pumpkins...I thought they had character...and they said the word "Boo-log," which I think is just hilarious!! Who ever heard of a group of black and white pumpkins saying something as crazy as "Boo-log this!!" Hah! I am crazy-mad creative today!
And how bout ths awesome giraffe? I think he looks positively huggable!
Oh, and this reminder of the coming holiday!

Tomorrow I work at the HS. Then I take Cora's car to the shop to have the oil changed. (Yes, I am that awesome) Oh, and the Air Museum called and asked me to come volunteer for them...seems now they have a video! Woo Hoo!! I told the guy I would see him tomorrow afternoon shortly before my oil change...I feel bad that I will only do it once in a blue moon, but Weekends mean a lot to me.
Oh, and why is it that it seems weekends move by so quickly? Especially while the workweek winds so DAMNED slowly by!!! Sucks!