Oh, folks. It ain't all rainbows and lollipops here in China.
Most of it is, though. It is a total joy seeing her face light up when she sees or learns something new. It was wonderful to finally discover the secret of making her "perfect" bottle (hot as lava), and then seeing her guzzle it. It is complete bliss to see her giggle when you tickle her. She lights up the room with her smile(I think it's the light reflecting off her four teeth!). Complete strangers tell us she has big eyes as though we might not have noticed. What's really fun is understanding exactly what they mean by body language when all they speak is Chinese. YOU KNOW they are telling you your daughter is beautiful...which she is. When she looks at you with those eyes you know you are helpless to do her bidding. She is very smart. She was comparing our hands with hers this afternoon, holding and turning each, and then referencing the same part of a different person's hand, her own included. She has the best laugh, and I love hearing her babble. She is almost perfect.
However...
Our girl does NOT go down for a nap. She does NOT go down for the night. She sleeps ON us. Until we can figure out a way to break her of that without making our hotel neighbors want throttle us for child abuse (and keeping them awake), I think we may be stuck. Also, when playing, she rarely leaves Cora's side. She plays with me, but that requires redirection and entertainment of the highest degree. Once in a rare while we can put her down and she is not in our arms, but, as with mid-night parent switching, it requires subterfuge.
Just tonight, we had a major meltdown because Mommy wanted to use the potty without an audience (imagine that). DAMN! That kid has lungs! I wouldn't be surprised if people living in the neighboring cities thought there was a fire drill or something in Changsha. I thought I was making fast inroads to being accepted...not so much, now. I think she considers me a necessary evil.
We decided that we both need to be able to take care of the kid, so the other can have a moment's privacy. When I hold her, try as I might, she gets unhappy fast. Unless she is in the Ergo (the front carrying strap thingy you see Cora wearing). AND if I step outside with her. She screams in my arms when we are in the room, but the moment we step out into the hallway where we might meet strangers...poof...Screaming bundle of anger to perfect little angel in 2 seconds flat. In the Ergo she actually will fall asleep for me.
I've done it twice with success both times. The last time, Cora was out of the room. Chloe was snoring as I walked back into the room. I decided to try putting her on the bed to see if she would stay asleep...
She did. I unhooked myself gingerly and left her there on the side of the bed, pulling a chair up next to her to make sure there are no falls! She has been sleeping for about 40 minutes now. One of us constantly at her side to keep her from rolling.
We both agree. Next time: I put her in the center of the bed surrounded with pillows.
8 comments:
The Ergo thing must work like a Thundershirt works for a dog. It is snug and makes a dog calmer during thunder storms and other stressful things. Jim, you could get one for Chloe or maybe yourself. LOL.
Keep at it. You will know her like know one else.
You guys are doing a great job! It is a dance that you will do for a long time.... But each day there is growth and more trust being built.
Sending lots of hugs and love,
Jody
Sounds like you're doing just great! She's finally getting plenty of one on one time - she never had that before did she - and maybe trying to make sure she gets her share before it is gone again (you never know now do you)? Hope everything else is ok, and yes the photo of your beautiful girls showed a rather tired Cora. I feel for you, I know rather too well how it is (although mine are 6 yrs and 19 mths...). All the best with the rest of your trip and looking forward to reading the next updates!
Love the updates! She is so precious! Have you tried dressing her like the Michelin Man for bed time? She is use to so many layers maybe that is her comfort zone. Laying on you guys is warm to her, they seem to like lots of warmth. Just an idea, which you most likely have already tried.
Karen may be right on the warmth of her at night. Hope you both get some rest at night,but you look like you are doing everything right she will come around I think all little ones like to here your heart beat it makes them feel close to you. Like Jade said she has never had this before. She knows she is loved. Keep the pictures coming.
Aunt Carol
That's suppose to be (hear) not here !! sorry
You're doing a great job. She will realize that this is forever and it will get better. Right now she's eating it up! She also feels comfortable enough with you guys that she does her acting out in private. Smart kid! She'll be even smarter when she throws a fit in the grocery store because she didn't get her way. ;)
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